The State Fair: adventures in deep frying and other atrocities

Several years ago – I don’t remember how long but if you’re from Toronto then the venue is a clue – I was at an Aida’s Falafel and ordered a falafel platter instead of a sandwich. It included deep fried eggplant and deep fried cauliflower, and  I recall thinking that this was the pinnacle of boiling oil technology.  But I was not well travelled then, and the internet of the day could fit on my current MacBook’s hard drive.

Things have changed.

The American spectacle known as the State Fair contains a number of, for lack of a better word, delicacies which really highlight the innovation in the deep-fried-o-sphere.  Don’t believe me?  Here’s a test: without looking at today’s link, go through this list of things that have been deep fried and sold, and tell me which one I made up.  200 Porny Points to the first correct guess:

Whole potato potato chips, Twinkies, Froot Loops, cookie dough, oreo cookies, Pepsi, peanut butter cups, Snickers, Mars Bars, Milky Ways, and butter.

Seriously, no cheating now! And when my “can’t possibly happen” item becomes reality in, like, 30 minutes, yes, I will claim royalties.  They won’t be used to fund cardiac wards, though: my yacht fund is running low and I have an urge to flee the mainland.

Moving on, if you’ve read any news at all this century, you’ll have seen the phrase “reduced dependence on foreign oil,” and some fair vendors are opting to do their part by developing non-deep fried artery-augmentation technology.  I’m talking cream puffs, doughnut burgers (yes, a burger with a Krispy Kreme bun) and chocolate covered bacon.

Despite the non-veganosity of many of the items under review, I think there’s a case of mainstream extremism here.  It’s not great for the animals, but it’s a garnish, if anything, on an industry that’s already killing billions.  Contrast that against “adventure food” like monkey brains and whatnot, and you’ll see a scale that makes a doughnut burger a novelty amidst a sea of other novelties, and within the context of the standard North American diet it’s just a different colour of crap instead of a new level of cruelty.

The key differentiator? If you’re already trying to think of ways to veganize something, it’s “mainstream extreme” and not simply disgusting.  I thought I was going to be innovative by suggesting chocolate-covered tempeh, but it exists already, for example.  The catch is that every one of these items are intended as once a year items, but we’ve got more than a thousand vendors, each trying to get you to try their junk food just once a year, and we end up with a culture that gets a treat with every meal.

Not disturbed enough? Here’s a snipped from the world’s most dangerous Google Images search to wrap things up:

(Thanks to Kathleen for the link!)

Tagged as: cuisine, deep fryer, doughnut, falafel, Fast Food, french fries, hamburger, krispy kreme, madness, oreo cookies, snack foods, twinkie